Hurry​-​Up Miriam! (Original Broadway Cast Recording)

by Mitch Friedman



The opening number to a fake Broadway musical about a woman who does everything really fast.


Hurry-Up Miriam, hurry up!
Time is short and she is on the go
Hurry-Up Miriam, hurry up!
When compared to her we're moving much, much too slow

Hurry-Up Miriam, hurry up!
Don't look now, she is on the run
Hurry-Up Miriam, hurry up!
Just as we get started, she’s already done

She's a whirlwind, she's a blur
We cannot keep up with her
She is frantic, she is speedy
Are we winded? Yes indeedy!
She is lightning, she is quick
Can anybody stop this chick?
She is rapid, meteoric
If she slows we'll be euphoric!

Hurry-Up Miriam, hurry up!
Everything she does is in a rush
Hurry-Up Miriam, hurry up!
No one else has ever gotten Usain Bolt to blush

Hurry-Up Miriam, hurry up!
Watch her make a list and check it thrice
Hurry-Up Miriam, hurry up!
Hyperventilating is her favorite vice

“Get a move on!
There's no time to waste!”
Why does she do everything in such a haste?

As a girl she had to clean her room just to get supper
Before Bounty, she was the quicker picker-upper
In her teens she dreamed to wear a beauty contest winner's sash
When that failed instead she ruled at winning the forty-yard dash
After being voted “The Most Likely to Succeed”
she succeeded quickly then won “Most Likely to Speed”

Miriam, what are you running from?
Everyone should stop and smell the roses
Miriam, life is a marathon
Pace yourself to reach the end
and on the way you’ll make new friends

“Hmm . . .
You’ve said your piece
I’ve heard your view
Now I just need to think it through
The trouble is that thanks to you
I’ve got another thing to do!”

Miriam, no!
“I gotta go!”
Oh . . .

Hurry-Up Miriam, hurry up!
She’s the fastest faster on Yom Kippur
Hurry-Up Miriam, hurry up!
While everyone just whines and moans, she gets super chipper

Miriam moves faster than a flesh-eating bacterium
Miriam sends every cocaine dealer to delirium
Miriam makes Run-Around Sue just stop and sneer-iam
Miriam, in a split-second goes from far to near-iam
Miriam is gone before you hold her beer-iam
Miriam covers more space than a planetarium

Hurry-Up Miriam, hurry up!
She's the quickest gal in all the land
Hurry-Up Miriam, hurry up!
Do not try to high-five her or you might break your hand

Hurry-Up Miriam, hurry up!
Somehow she is never out of breath
Hurry-Up Miriam, hurry up!
We think she’ll have vigor mortis right after her death

(c) 2019 Mitch Friedman


released April 29, 2019
Mitch Friedman - all music and vocals


all rights reserved



Mitch Friedman New York, New York

One-man band purveyor of quirky pop in a variety of styles, some made up.

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